REX

I walk a French bulldog named Rex.  He's completely awesome.  Except for the fact that he's a complete asshole.  Sort of like the third guy I went out with after breaking up with the ex.  Completely awesome.  Complete douchebag.   Rex the dog is adorable in a ridiculous way.  Kind of that whole "so ugly he's cute" sort of way.  I don't know if I'd go so far to say Rex the guy is like that but physically he's a little shorter than I'd prefer both in height and in, well, you know.  He's still ridiculously attractive in a strange way though...  Rex the dog has the capacity to be super snuggly, lovey and fantastic to spend time with.  BUT...if he's cranky or just not inclined to be decent, he can literally bite you in the ass.  Rex the guy will give you the most amazing first date you've ever had, make you feel as though you have an unparalleled connection and then after a screwy little mis-step on the second date, give you a blow off that rivals all blow offs.  And to think-you gave that bastard the best belly rub of his life.